Two Public Faces

Our world (well, the United States, at least) seems to have settled upon two public faces for itself. I noticed this this morning and started thinking about it. A little.

Face Number One: Mall face. Also known as George Bush Face. The slack-jawed, glazed-eye, had-to-much-to-shop-last-night face that is most commonly found at your nearest indoor recreation center (i.e. shopping mall). It's the look that says, "I inhaled too much Yankee Candle." The look that says, "Too much PacSun music." The look that says, "Somewhere I have three brain cells functioning to decide if I need to upgrade my cellphone or my cellphone plan." The look that says, "Yes, Victoria's Secret is the answer, not the gym." The look that says, "I eat a diverse diet of Sbarro, Panda Wok, Au Bon Pain, and Popeyes. I am healthy."

Click once if you think you've seen this look.

Face Number Two: Angry Face. Also known as "White Guy in Oversized Pickup" Face (seen in your rearview mirror as he rushes to no place important with nothing in the cargo box and nothing in tow). It's the look I see on most women when they're talking on their cellphones whilst driving. The look I see on the guy in the electronics section at Wal-Mart on those two occasions each year when I find myself in that god-foresaken place. Other places you'll commonly see angry face? Children's soccer matches (on the parents). NFL fans come Sunday. People waiting in line -- just about anywhere. Poltiticians not kissing babies.

Click twice if you think you've seen this look.

After realizing that clicking does nothing, you'll find one of these two looks on your own face. Now wipe it off, go outside, and present a different face to the world. As the old saying goes, "Smile, and other people will think you're up to something." I'm not all for smiles and happiness and light, but something different seems in order.