Enough Already

It's 20 degrees outside. Farenheit. I have had enough. Today, for you religious types, is Ash Wednesday. Well, who cares about that, really, except the fatuously ignorant? But I reference Ash Wednesday because it is an indicator of something else. Ash Wednesday means there's 40 days until we land on the next ridiculous Christian nonsense day, Easter. You know, white rabbits and resurrected shamen. Or some such thing. Candy, egg hunts, ham, and the ascension to heaven and the right hand of god of some unshaven Jewish guy who had studied enough with the Buddhists in western India to know a thing or two about how to treat people nicely.

The geeks shall inherit the earth, right?

Well, the point I am getting at is that this Easter hullabaloo does do a fine job of coinciding with the true kickoff of spring -- a little more effectively than the start of the baseball season, which can sometimes fall at the same time snowstorms are dumping the cold white stuff on The Jake in Cleveland.

I am ready for Spring. Easter? Well, I just hope, for the kids' sake, that the snow has melted enough to make the egg hunt interesting this year. It sucks when the bunny has to watch out where he steps so no one sees his boot tracks in the snow.

If the polar bears are looking for a little extra ice in their gin-and-tonics this year, I have some I can offer. I'd rather have a soiree with them than those freaks giving shit up for 40 days like it'll save their souls or something.

And whatever happened to fish on Fridays, Mayor McCheese?